I Want to Help Young Women Be Protective of their Sexual Health and Comfortable with their Sexuality.

Eileen is an online peer educator with MySistahs.

My name is Eileen. I am 23 years old and I graduated from the University of California Irvine in 2007 with a Bachelors of Arts degree in Asian American Studies and a minor in Film and Media Studies. Currently, I live in Chicago and work as a program assistant for a non-profit organization dedicated to increasing the racial and ethnic diversity in the legal profession. Combining my interests in social justice issues affecting communities of color and in questions of sex and sexuality, I became an online peer educator for MySistahs to help young women of color deal with sexual and reproductive health issues.

I want to be able to help equip young people with the tools, resources and knowledge to make informed, responsible decisions about their sexual lives. Growing up I heard mixed messages about sex: who can have it, when they can have it, and in what contexts it is “okay.” Images and messages from highly sexualized American media conflicted with my conservative ethnic and religious upbringing. As a Catholic Filipina American, it was taboo to talk about sex outside the context of marriage. Marriage validated sex and if you had sex before you were married then you were doing something “bad.” I even attended a church program where I joined a handful of other young women in taking a virginity pledge, and proceeded to wear a ring symbolic of this promise for years after. Such abstinence-until-marriage education was limiting in the way that I was simply told not to have sex without being told how to protect myself should I decide to do so. I was fortunate in that I received more comprehensive sexual education through my public schooling, but it wasn’t enough. Through personal experience I have learned the joys and pleasures of being sexually active, but I have also learned that there are risks and consequences. I learned that you must be proactive about protecting yourself once you become sexually active. Even if you are having sex with someone you truly love, that’s not to say that he/she will necessarily protect you from sexually transmitted infections. I wish I had been taught more about sexual health issues. But I also wish I had taken the initiative to learn more on my own so that I could have made better informed decisions. As much as sex can be a very positive experience, there are risks involved and I hope to help others navigate through their own sexual experiences in a safe and healthy way.

I want to also help young women feel comfortable embracing their sexual identities. Even though I was routinely taught that premarital sex was “bad,” I came to know sex as something that can be very enjoyable and special, and I believe that no one should be made to feel guilty for desiring it. Understanding myself better now I know too that my sexuality is an important part of my identity. And as my friends learn this about me, I have oftentimes been a confidant to them; they who would otherwise feel uncomfortable talking openly about their sexual lives and any conflicts they may be going through. Such experiences make me realize more and more the lack of frank and open dialogue about sex and sexual health in American culture, and I would like to change that.

In the future I look forward to attending graduate school to research the intersections of race, class, gender, sexuality, power and media. Specifically, I would like to explore how the idea of “virginity” plays into the construction of female sexuality and gender roles. I am also interested in attending law school so that I may better understand how law and policies affect sexual and reproductive health issues. Additionally I am interested in becoming a sexual health educator, and being an advocate for comprehensive sexual health in a direct and tangible way. Whichever route I end up following, I look forward to becoming more active in helping institute positive changes in the way American culture views and treats issues of sexuality and sexual and reproductive health.